“To live a creative life, we must lose our fear of being wrong.”
-Joseph Clinton Pearce

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I saw this quote hanging from the ceiling of Bella’s elementary last night as I walked into parent teacher conference. I said it to myself over and over as I walked down the long hall so I wouldn’t forget it before I had a chance to write it down. It was the icing on the cake to a day that had already brought with it a few stresses and many thoughts about what I want to achieve and where I’m headed. As I took out my note book to write down the quote these words poured out of me.

I would have never called myself creative years ago. I remember loving art projects and drawing as a kid, but also remember that feeling of uncertainty that I had no clue what I’m was doing. I remember always trying to look to others for inspiration instead of looking inside myself. Perhaps even then I was uncomfortable with what I saw.

As I think back I can remember searching through old boxes to find any and all the photos of me I could to create a scrapbook. I had a strong desire to tell my story even then and wished I had known more about my childhood. I still feel that way today, which is one of the reasons why I still scrapbook and document what I can about life, my life and those around me. However, I only mention it to remind myself it was at that time, while I made those books, that I didn’t worry about what it might look like, if it was good enough, or what someone else my think. I did it for me, for my heritage, and I was very proud of it.

Fast forward 9 years later when I got my first sewing machine, then I started scrapbooking, I had kids, then many other things fell into place for me creatively. I started knitting, made quilts, cards, other paper crafts, and got heavy into photography. It has been an evolution for me one thing building on the another, however, one thing seemed to have remain constant though it all…the uncertainty I felt of not measuring up. I use to feel bombarded and even discouraged by all the scrapbooking magazines full of inspiration and knew I didn’t even come close to touching what those talented woman created. Of all the photographers I’ve studied I knew my abilities just didn’t even come close to there’s. These thoughts definitely held me back from creating in a meaningful and comfortable place.

“Never compare your journey with someone else’s. It’s a marathon with no finish line. Someone else may start out faster than you, may seem to progress more quickly than you, but every runner has his own pace. Your journey is your journey, not a competition. You will never ‘arrive’. No one ever does.”
-Cheryl Jacobs

I came upon that quote months ago when I was making a very important should I/shouldn’t I decision in my life and it helped me to see how I was mistakenly measuring success by other peoples standards…with dollar signs, with being published, with being well known. Yesterday I came across it and was once again reminded of how much making that decision changed my life. I know for me being creative isn’t just something I do for fun, it’s something I love. Not only something I love, but it’s something I need and want in my life. It wasn’t until recently when I let go of the measuring stick, the fear of being wrong that has continue to hold me back for years, that I felt this rush of comfort and confidence in my creative self. I no longer worry or fear that it might not be good enough. I do it because I love doing it. Don’t get me wrong, there are times when I’m not as confident as others, I still need to work on so many areas of self-confidence in my life, but I’m beginning to see just how much changing my attitude changes my creativity. Changes my life.

If I could tell myself 11 year old self something today it would be to LIVE YOUR LIFE and never apologize for it. Not to say not to take others feeling into consideration, but be you and express yourself how you choose. We are all creative in our own ways so stop wasting time worrying about it being perfect or whether or not it measures up to others standards. Remember who you are and embrace what you love. You have the power to make your life whatever you choose. Just DO!