my 2015 word

It came to me in November. I wasn’t looking for a word, but it was just there, standing out, almost calling to me. I know that sounds contrived, but that’s exactly how I remember it. It was just there in my face.

I immediately went to the dictionary to see exactly what it meant and if indeed this was a word I could embrace for 2015.

strive: verb
1) to exert oneself vigorously; try hard
2) to make strenuous efforts toward any goal

Admittedly I didn’t love the definition. “Exert oneself vigorously” is not necessarily my strong suit or does it make me feel comfortable (hindsight I should have known — I have learned far too often, I get no where by being comfortable). So I went directly to the thesaurus to see what other words related to STRIVE.

aim
concentrate
do one’s best
direct
focus
plan
purpose
seek
try

These words resonated with me and how I was feeling about 2015. I feel like in the last few years I’ve been entirely too passive in my life. There’s been too much sitting, too much waiting, and it was time to take charge and tackle 2015 with movement and action. So I decided then and there that STRIVE was it for 2015. It was time to get uncomfortable.

And then I began to back slide, to second guess my decision because that is what I do.

The more I thought about STRIVE the more I panicked. It’s a powerful word. A word with a lot of expectations, a lot of expectations I wasn’t entirely sure I could live up to. I was afraid I would get into it and give up because I wasn’t measuring up — that I couldn’t measure up. I didn’t want 2015 to be a failure from the beginning.

So I started to look at other words. I struggled somewhat in this process and began looking back at previous years that had been successful, I really wanted to set myself up to be successful, and had a powerful impact on my life. GIVE stood out. So I mulled it over and over and thought, Ok I’ll just repeat my 2010 word, there are no rules. I can do what I want. So I went with it and thought about it a lot over the Christmas holiday, still debating between STRIVE and GIVE.

Until a few days ago when I went for sushi with my friend Amy. After a delightful meal I grabbed my fortune cookie out of the basket as I walked out. And in the brisk 12 degree weather I read,

And immediately when I read it I started laughing. I had received my answer. It wasn’t necessarily what I wanted, but I know it’s what I need.

STRIVE.

Touching and intimacy heighten our enjoyment of life. viagra online generic A coronary heart can start to play http://secretworldchronicle.com/2015/04/ep-8-13-danger-zone-part-3/ on line levitra a part around diabetic issues. Therefore, combining Shilajit capsules with NF Cure click here for more info buy generic viagra capsules to boost vigor and regain lost youth. A whole lot of people that get pancreatic cancer buy viagra cheap never even know what it is that the pancreas does. This year is not about what comes easy. As much as I want this year to be, so to speak, effortless, I know what I need is STRIVING. This year is about pushing through my fears that have been holding me back for far too long. Letting go of what I think it should be and allowing my strengths to guide me. Ali Edwards talks a lot about living the length and the width. Really stretching yourself and that’s what I want for 2015. I want to stretch myself. I want to strive for progress. I need more progress in my life. More movement. More growth. More action.

What does it mean to STRIVE? What does it look like? How do I want to STRIVE this year? These are loaded questions I hope to continue to answer throughout the year, but below are a few thoughts I’ve had the last few days.

This year I want to STRIVE for openness. I want to finally break down my walls that have been holding me back from doing because I’ve been afraid to fail, afraid to get hurt. It’s time. I know my walls are only providing me with the illusion of safety when really all it’s doing is keeping me alone. I need to tackle this head on.

STRIVE to strengthen my relationships. (I believe focusing on this aspect of my life will be huge in helping bring down my walls.) I want to give all of myself to Adam. We have made huge progress in our relationship through the years, but unfortunately I am still holding back pieces of myself out of fear (its possible I may need therapy for this one since my holding back is all subconscious). I want to give to Adam what he needs (not just what I want to give) and continue to develop the relationship we have been working towards. I want to be present in my girls’ life and give them what they need individually. I want to spend more time with them one on one and get to know them on a deeper level.

STRIVE for more creativity. I have missed this deeply in my life. Truly missed having a project, getting messy, and stretching my mind. I also want to share my creativity with my girls and teach them in the areas they want to learn.

STRIVE for health. For the most part I am good to my body. I tend to eat good and exercise 5 times a week. Sadly though, my eating good is largely counter productive to the amount of sugar I put in my body. I lack energy which seriously hinders how productive I want to be daily. I’ve tried slaying the sugar dragon in the past so I’m no fool when it comes to attempting to curb an addiction — it’s quite difficult. Beginning Jan05 I will only have sugar once a week. Of course I’ll keep you posted on how this will go.

STRIVE to be closer to the spirit.

STRIVE for Joy.

STRIVE for patience with myself when the progress is slow remembering to take my goals in stride. I’m beginning small, line upon line, easing into where I want to go knowing I don’t have to accomplish this all in 365 days, but over many years to come.

I can’t wait to see what 2015 holds. I’m ready, are you ready?

Do you choose a word to focus on?
Make New Year Resolutions?

my 2015 word

Share This Story

Related Posts

Leave A Comment Cancel reply